Issue #45 - August 15, 2000 <<8 A+ ACTIONS for BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM>>

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brought to you by Laurie Riddell Geary, M.Ed., PCC.
Coaching you to get your life IN GEAR by making shifts, getting
unstuck, finding balance, accelerating your growth, and mapping
the best route to your chosen destination: a life filled with
passion and purpose.

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<Table of Contents:
 1. Welcome and Thank You
 2. Topic: <<A+ ACTIONS for BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM >> (reprint)
 3. A Coaching Telegroup on Building Your Self Esteem with the 8-A System
 4. Recommended TASKS
 5. Recommended READING
 6  Upcoming Local WORKSHOPS
 7. SUBSCRIPTION information

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This week's issue is a reprint of a newsletter I wrote in March...which is the basic outline of a book I am writing on self esteem and the focus of an inter-developmental self esteem coaching group I will be offering in the Fall.
Also, I welcome 12 new subscribers to my newsletter!  I thank you all for your support and encouragement.

8 A+ ACTIONS for BUILDING SELF ESTEEM  (reprint from Issue #22) 
copyright - all rights reserved - Laurie R. Geary, 2000

1. ACCEPTANCE
Accepting who we are...our strengths as well as our weaknesses...is an important aspect of building our positive self esteem.  Accepting that <I'm O.K> just as I am; knowing IALAC =< I am lovable and capable> and that I don't need to DO anything to be worthwhile.  I can just BE. Accepting that we are all born with <one unit of worth> which never changes... thus we are all equal. At the same time we need to accept that we are also totally unique from anyone else in the universe.
*Action Step: Reflect on/Meditate on the specialness of YOU...Find times to just BE....Accept yourself for whom you are.

2. ACKNOWLEDGMENT
We need to acknowledgment ourselves in order to build our self esteem: acknowledge our actions...our positive behaviors. Do you acknowledge your <wins>?  How often do you take a moment to pat yourself on the back for a job well done? a kind action? an act of kindness?
*Action Steps: Keep a daily list of actions that build your self esteem and acknowledge yourself for taking those actions.  Next step: tell others about your positive actions - Brag a little!
Also..Ask for acknowledgment - tell others how you like to be acknowledged; and, when you are acknowledged, listen/take it in...and simply say <thank you>!

And remember to acknowledge others.  We do this by giving compliments ...positive feedback..pats on the back...hugs... How often do you acknowledge others?  My clients often report that being acknowledged by me for their actions is the only time they get acknowledged during the week!  The basic premise, and magic technique,  from the  <The One Minute Manager> books by Ken Blanchard is <catch someone being good...and tell them!>  According to him, the ratio of compliments to criticisms in life should be 4:1; yet for most of us this ratio is the reverse: 4 criticisms for every 1 compliment!  and we've even learned to accept that!  Accept it no longer!
*Action Step: Make the intention to change the ratio: this week give 4 compliments each day to someone you love or care about.

3. ACHIEVEMENTS
The more we set goals and achieve them, the better we feel about ourselves.  Self esteem is built over the years by our continued accomplishments: this is the DOING. 
*Action Step: List 100 Accomplishments  - and continue to add to this list.

4. AFFILIATIONS 
Affiliations are our connections/relationships with others.  Connections bring us happiness and health and high self esteem.  Numerous studies prove that having friends reduces the risk of death as well as increases health!   We survive and thrive with our affiliations, so we need to nurture our relationships and continually build new ones.
*Action Step: Make a date with a friend today and make a new friend..increase your affiliation bank.

5. ATTRACTION
Attraction is a way of life...a modus operandi..it is a way of  being whole and present so that you effortlessly draw into your life what you want. 
According to Thomas Leonard, author of  <The Portable Coach>, there are 28 Principles of 
Attraction which, if followed, will help you develop these qualities of attraction within yourself.
*Action Steps: Practice Principle #1: Become Selfish...read more about this principle in <The Portable Coach> or take a teleclass<www.teleclass.com> to learn the Attraction Principles.

6. ATTITUDE
Attitude is everything, they say; we are in charge of our attitudes.  Our attitude about ourself is the cornerstone of our self esteem.  We need to be aware of our attitude..is it positive or negative?  How strong is our inner critic?  We need to learn ways to argue with our inner  negative self-talk..our  vulture or gremlin..and find ways to reduce or eliminate it.
Most of us need an attitude readjustment in order to build our self esteem!
Remember <No one can make you inferior without your consent> Eleanor Roosevelt
*Action Step: Keep track of all your negative self talk during the day...become more aware..and ARGUE with these negative statements!  Replace them with positive statements such as Affirmations.

7. AFFIRMATIONS
Affirmations are strong, positive statements that are said as if they are already true about you.
 The theory is that by stating these affirmations, eg. I am a dynamic and interesting speaker, 
we see ourselves AS IF and create a gap that we are naturally drawn to close.
There are specific guidelines on how to write, verbalize, and integrate affirmations into our lives; it is a technique that can be learned. Using visualizations along with Affirmations can add even more power to the statements.
*Action Step: Write three affirmations and repeat them 20 times each per day; read Shakti Gawain's book, CREATIVE VISUALIZATION, to learn how to integrate affirmations and visualizations into your life.

8. ASSERTIVENESS
Assertiveness is a way of getting your needs met while respecting the rights of others.  Assertiveness is first an attitude based upon your belief that you have the right to get your needs met. Then there are specific techniques/skills that can be learned to help you set boundaries and standards to be assertive.
*Action Step: Take an Assertiveness Training Seminar at a local community college or read BE YOUR BEST, by Linda Adams.

Additional A's:
 ACCELERATE your growth in building your self esteem: Take these ACTION steps this week and be  ACCOUNTABLE for your actions. 

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ANNOUNCING a new coaching group - an affordable way to have the coaching you need to build your self esteem: 
 <<BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM THROUGH THE AWESOME 8-A SYSTEM>>

.Each session of this telegroup will focus on one of the 8 A's of Self Esteem Development*...a unique, inspiring and practical process for positive change. 

Topics to focus on include:
*Developing your A+ Attributes to Attract what you want in your life. 
*Becoming more Aware of your needs and wants. 
*Being Accountable for your Actions
*Acknowledging and Accepting yourself and others using skills that work miracles. 
*Becoming more Assertive: Asking for what you want; Avoiding what you don't want; 

Act now! Take Actions to Accelerate your growth...move forward faster in your self esteem development and learn how to  Activate the 8 A's of Building Your Self Esteem.

*an e-Workbook on the 8-A System for Building Self Esteem provided.
*e-Handouts provided per session to supplement self esteem topics

Telegroup limited to 8 participants. 

Session Dates: 
*Free Introductory sessions: Thursday, Sept. 7 @ 9pm EST also Thursday, November 2 @ 9pm EST
Take a self esteem assessment; get an overview of the 8 A's; determine if the telegroup will support you in building your self esteem.
 
*Phase 1: Thursdays @ 9pm EST - Sept 14 -21-27-October 4
Cost: $179
 
*Phase 2: Thursdays @ 9pm EST - November 9-16-30-December 7
Cost: $179 

Cost for enrolling in  both Phases: $300

**please note: if these dates/times are inconvenient for you, contact Laurie to arrange a coaching telegroup for you and your colleagues/friends.

To Register: Go to www.teleclassinternational.com 

or, for more information, contact Laurie Geary @ (617)494-1422 or email: laurie@ingearcoaching.com 
or see her website @www.ingearcoaching.com

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TASKS =

1. Register for the coaching telegroup to begin building your self esteem with the Awesome 8-A System

2.  Read one of the books or listen to one of the tape sets mentioned  below.

3. Go to my Website www.ingearcoaching.com for back issues of my newsletter related to building self esteem. 

4. Call me for a complimentary half-hour COACHING session to support you in building your self esteem...
Voice:617-494-1422;  email: laurie@ingearcoaching.com

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Recommended READING
SELF ESTEEM: A PROVEN PROGRAM of COGNITIVE TECHNIQUES for ASSESSING, IMPROVING and MAINTAINING YOUR SELF-ESTEEM, by Matthew McKay & Patrick Fanning
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0312904436/gearupforsuccela

WOMEN & SELF ESTEEM: UNDERSTANDING & IMPROVING the WAY WE THING and FEEL ABOUT OURSELVES, by Linda Sanford and Mary Ellen Donovan.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0140052255/gearupforsuccela

The SIX PILLARS of SELF ESTEEM, by Nathaniel Branden
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0553095293/gearupforsuccela

EMPOWERMENT TAKES MORE THAN A MINUTE, by Ken Blanchard
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/1576750337/gearupforsuccela

TAMING YOUR GREMLIN by Richard Carson
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0060961023/gearupforsuccela

SELF ESTEEM and PEAK PERFORMANCE, by Jack Canfield (audiocassette)
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/1559770295/gearupforsuccela

HEART AT WORK: STORIES and STRATEGIES for BUILDING SELF ESTEEM, 
by Jack Canfield and Jacqueline Miller
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0070116431/gearupforsuccela

BE YOUR BEST, by Linda Adams
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/087223553X/gearupforsuccela

CREATIVE VISUALIZATION, by Shakti Gawain
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ISBN/0931432022/gearupforsuccela

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 <UPCOMING LOCAL WORKSHOPS>:

BE A PERSONAL & PROFESSIONAL COACH
*Boston Center for Adult Education
Monday, September 18  - also, Monday, November 13.
and
*Middlesex Community College
Saturday, September 23rd from 9-4 pm
and
*North Shore Community College
Wednesday, September 27th from 9-3 pm

TEAM-BUILDING:
*Thompson Island Outward Bound Education Center
August 2...September 6th and 16th
and
*The Warren Conference Center...Northeastern University
August 30 & 31st.

RISK-TAKING: THE PATH to PERSONAL GROWTH
*North Shore Community College
Wednesday, October 4th from 9-3 pm
also
*BCAE - Monday, October 16  from 6:30-9:30 pm.

BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM with the 8 A+ SYSTEM
North Shore Community College
Wednesday, October 11th from 9-3 pm

ATTRACTING WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE
*Middlesex Community College - Saturday, October 14th from 9 to 4 pm

TEAM-BUILDING:
*Thompson Island Outward Bound Education Center
August 14...September 6th and 16th
and
*The Warren Conference Center of Northeastern University
August 30 & 31st.

Games and Initiatives for Learning
*ICF Conference, Balance Program, Vancouver, BC
October 27, 2000

* RANCHO LA PUERTA SPA, Tecate, Mexico
December 16-22, 2000

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Please  forward your copy of this newsletter to anyone you think might
enjoy reading it.  I am trying to build my subscriber list to reach 500. I appreciate your support. I just request that you keep the broadcast intact...nothing changed, added or deleted, including subscription information and my contact and copyright information. Thankyou
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or visit my website at www.ingearcoaching.com 
 
 

Laurie R. Geary, M.Ed.
 Professional  Certified Coach, Certified Teleclass Leader
Register for my free weekly newsletter: GEAR UP for SUCCESS!
 at my website: www.ingearcoaching.com
Sign up for my September coaching telegroup: Building Your Self Esteem with the 8-A System
Phone: (617)494-1422  Fax: (617)494-1786
Address: 4 Canal Park, PH9, Cambridge, MA 02141 
Graduate: Coach U www.coachu.com