Issue #82 - May,18  2001 <<Dealing with Change!>>

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
brought to you by Laurie Riddell Geary, M.Ed., PCC.
Coaching you to get your life IN GEAR by making shifts, getting
unstuck, finding balance, accelerating your growth, and mapping
the best route to your chosen destination: a life filled with
passion and purpose.

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In this issue:
        1. Welcome!
        2. Weekly Article:  <<Dealing with Change>>
        *Reasons for Resistance to Change
        *The Stages of Change
        *Top Ten Ways to Create & Manage Change
        3. Recommended Tasks
        4. Recommended Books
        5. Upcoming  Teleclasses  and local Workshops
        6. Subscription information
 

1. WELCOME!

Welcome to <GEAR UP FOR SUCCESS!> and a warm welcome to all
my new subscribers!  I really appreciate your forwarding my newsletter
to all your friends and colleagues. I now have over 500 subscribers!
Your recommendations help me grow and develop as a coach. Anyone
can subscribe by going to my website @ www.ingearcoaching.com.
Thank you so much for your support!
 
 

2.  **Weekly Article:  <<DEALING WITH CHANGE>>

        Change is difficult...yet change is essential if we are to grow!
But why is it so hard for us to change?  Why do we resist change?

        REASONS for RESISTANCE to CHANGE:

* Maintaining our SELF IDENTITY: if we change we become someone
new/different...we must adjust our image of ourself.  Most of us prefer
the familiar, comfortable image of ourself, even if we don't like all that we see.
We are who we are!

*FEARS:  Change requires that we risk failure, criticism, conflict, loss of friends,
 loss of the known.   Our fears keep us from wanting to change.

*EXPECTANCY THEORY: We like predictability; we like to know what to
expect. We create expectations based on our past experiences, our
perceptions, our beliefs and values. It is difficult to change our expectations
and change often requires us to have different expectations.

*UNRESOLVED GUILT from Childhood: if we are stuck in unresolved issues
from our past, we cannot move on..and make changes...until we have
resolved these issues.

*EFFORT and HARD WORK: Change requires effort and hard work and persistence;
this can be hard to maintain.

*STRESS:   Change is stressful!  Most of us would rather not have stress in our
life, yet, if we are to change, we must accept stress.

*NO AWARENESS of the Need to Change.

*NO KNOWLEDGE/SKILLS on how to Change:  Sometimes we just don't know how
to change and we just need information and/or training.

*NO SUPPORT:  Change is easier if we have people to support and encourage us
to change....and to celebrate with us when we succeed!
 

Understanding the Process of Change can help remove our resistance.

        THE STAGES OF CHANGE:

1. PRE-CONTEMPLATION: No awareness of the need to change.

2. CONTEMPATION: Now there is some awareness of the need to change;
     but you vacilate between your reasons to change and your reasons
     to stay the same.
     This is a stage characterized by much ambivalence and indecision.

3. DETERMINATION: Now a definite decision has been made to change.
    You look for information, skills, and supports to help you.
    It is helpful to set clear and concrete goals and to identify effective
    strategies for change.

4. ACTION:  You take the actions necessary to change.

5. MAINTAINANCE: Continuation of successful change efforts and actions.

6. RELAPSE: This is a normal part of the change process!  You need to avoid
    discouragement by returning to the contemplation stage, seeking out supports,
    finding ways to become motivated again.
 
 

        Top Ten Ways to CREATE and MANAGE CHANGE:

1. VISUALIZATION: Create an image of the thing you wish to happen.  Add
    sensory data: see, hear, feel your results.  Add details...as many as you can.

2. IDENTIFY & REMOVE NEGATIVE SELF TALK:  Become aware of the
    negative messages you tell yourself that will keep you from making changes.

3. MANAGE SELF ESTEEM: Self esteem is your source of power to use to make changes!
    Health esteem is the cornerstone to being successful at making change.

4. ATTACH a NEW HABIT to an old HABIT.  This technique makes it easier to move
    into something new.

5. USE AFFIRMATIONS:  Create affirmations to tell yourself daily; affirmations will attract
    to you the changes you want to make.  i.e. I am lovable and capable; I am a successful
    entrepreneur; I am in a loving and respectful relationship.

6. WELCOME CHANGE!  Know that change is good for us; we grow and flourish with
    change.  Change is the spice of life!  Without change life would be very boring.

7. BEHAVIORAL REHEARSAL: Practice acting and feeling differently.  The changes
    you want to make will begin to feel more natural and then become a permanent part of you.
          THINK "AS IF" - FEEL "AS IF" - ACT "AS IF" ("FAKE IT 'TIL YOU MAKE IT!")

8. BE AWARE of your RESISTANCE and REMOVE IT!

9. REWARD YOURSELF for Making Changes!

10. FIND PEOPLE:  ROLE MODELS, MENTORS, COACHES...people to support and motivate
        you to make change; people who will celebrate your success in making pchanges.
 

**copyright: all rights reserved: Laurie Geary, May, 2001
 
 

3. Recommended TASKS:

1. Register for my upcoming teleclass on Risk-Taking (and Change)
 Wednesday, June 13th @ 9pm EST
*To register, email Laurie or go to www.teleclass.com or www.womensu.com

2. Check out the vast listings of teleclasses at the websites mentioned above
and take a teleclass!

3. Interested in Risk-taking...and Change?
 Purchase my new workbook: RISK TO GROW!
(see below)

4. Call or email me for a complimentary half-hour COACHING session to help you
 in making changes for your personal or professional growth.
 Voice:617-494-1422;  email: laurie@ingearcoaching.com

5. Go to my Website www.ingearcoaching.com for back issues of my newsletter to read
 more articles on taking risks, building self esteem, finding your passion, resolving conflict,
coaching...and much more

6. Read one of the books recommended below related to change
 
 

4. Recommended BOOKS:

<WHO MOVED MY CHEESE? An A-Mazing Way to Deal with Change
in Your Work and in Your Life> by Spencer Johnson
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0399144463/gearupforsuccela

<CHANGING FOR GOOD: A REVOLUTIONARY SIX-STAGE PROGRAM
for OVERCOMING BAD HABITS and MOVING YOUR LIFE POSITIVELY
FOWARD> by Prochaska, Norcross, DiClemente
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/038072572x/gearupforsuccela

<IT ONLY TAKES A MINUTE TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE!> by Willie Jolley
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0312961103/gearupforsuccela

<RISKING>, by David Viscott
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0671664093/gearupforsuccela

<FEEL the FEAR and DO IT ANYWAY>, by Susan Jeffers,
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0449902027/gearupforsuccela

or....
Order my new workbook:
<RISK TO GROW! CREATE the LIFE YOU WANT through RESPONSIBLE RISK-TAKING>
a collection of articles, top tens, models, poems & quotes, and exercises on Risk-Taking....
or
 order my other booklet on experiential activities for trainers: 75 of my favorite activities
learned from years of working as an instructor for Outward Bound Professional Development
Programs <GAMES & INITIATIVES for NETWORKING, ENERGIZING, & TEAM-BUILDING>.

Both booklets now available...hard copy ($20) or pdf. file ($15)
Send check to Laurie Geary, 4 Canal Park, PH9, Cambridge, MA 02141;
email request to: laurie@ingearcoaching.com or
order at my website: www.ingearcoaching.com
 

5. UPCOMING <TELECLASSES> and  <LOCAL WORKSHOPS>:

<TELECLASSES>

* RISK TO GROW! Create the Life You Want through Responsible Risk-Taking.
Learn the 3-Step Risk-Taking Process. Identify Risking Motivators & Blocks,
Resources and much more.
 Wednesday, June 13th @ 9pm EST

*BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM with the 8-A SYSTEM
North Shore Community College (NSCC)
 4 Thursdays, September 6-13-20-27 @ 8pmEST
Call NSCC to register (978) 762-6722
 

<LOCAL WORKSHOPS>:

RISK-TAKING: The Path to Personal Growth:
*Boston Center for Adult Education
Thursday, June 7th from 6:30-9:30 pm
*North Shore Community College
Wednesday, September 26th from 9-3pm

BE A PERSONAL & PROFESSIONAL COACH
*Boston Center for Adult Education
  6:30-9:30 pm; Tuesday, June 5, 2001
*North Shore Community College
Wednesday, September 12th, from 9-3pm

BUILDING YOUR SELF ESTEEM with the 8-A SYSTEM
North Shore Community College
Wednesday, September 19th from 9-3pm

MBTI - Myers Briggs Type Indicator
Beverly Hospital Nurse Preceptors
Staff Training
August 2, 12-4pm

TEAM BUILDING TRAINING
Bevery Hospital
Friday, May 18th, 9-12

PLAY & LEARN! Games & Initiatives for Networking,
Energizing, and Team Building: Balance Program
at the International Coach Federation Annual Conference
Chicago, Illinois
August  16, 2001
 
 

6. SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION
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