Issue #66 - January, 26  2001 <<Risk to Grow....and Find Your Passion!>>

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brought to you by Laurie Riddell Geary, M.Ed., PCC.
Coaching you to get your life IN GEAR by making shifts, getting
unstuck, finding balance, accelerating your growth, and mapping
the best route to your chosen destination: a life filled with
passion and purpose.

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Table of Contents:

 1. Topic  and related Poems <<Risk to Grow...and Find Your Passion!>>
         2. Recommended Tasks
 3. Recommended Books
         4. Upcoming Teleclasses and local Workshops
         5. Subscription information

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Risk to Grow..... and  Find your Passion!      ***all rights reserved, Laurie Geary, January, 2001

<If you want to feel secure, do what you already know how to do.
But if you want to grow, go to the cutting edge of your competence,
which means a temporary loss of security.
So, whenever you don't quite know what you are doing,
know that you are growing>
by David Viscott

<NO PROBLEM!
Don't worry if you have problems! Which is easy to say until you are in the
midst of a really big one, I know. But the only people I am aware of who
don't have troubles are gathered in little neighborhoods. Most communities
have at least one. We call them cemeteries.
If you're breathing, you have difficulties. It's the way of life. And believe
it or not, most of your problems may actually be good for you! Let me explain.
Maybe you have seen the Great Barrier Reef, stretching some 1,800 miles from
New Guinea to Australia. Tour guides regularly take visitors to view the
reef. On one tour, the guide was asked an interesting question. "I notice
that the lagoon side of the reef looks pale and lifeless, while the ocean side is vibrant and colorful,"
a traveler observed. "Why is this?"
The guide gave an interesting answer: "The coral around the lagoon side is in
still water, with no challenge for its survival. It dies early. The coral on
the ocean side is constantly being tested by wind, waves, storms -- surges of
power. It has to fight for survival every day of its life. As it is
challenged and tested it changes and adapts. It grows healthy. It grows
strong. And it reproduces." Then he added this telling note: "That's the way
it is with every living organism."
That's how it is with people. Challenged and tested, we come alive! Like
coral pounded by the sea, we grow. Physical demands can cause us to grow
stronger. Mental and emotional stress can produce tough-mindedness and
resiliency. Spiritual testing can produce strength of character and
faithfulness.
So, you have problems -- no problem! Just tell yourself, "There I grow again! >
 submitted by a reader
 

<The Blessings of Struggle>
A man found a cocoon of an emperor moth.  He took it home so that he could watch the moth come out of the cocoon.  On the day a small opening appeared, he sat and watched the moth for several hours as the moth struggled to force the body through the little hole.   Then it seemed to stop making any progress.  It appeared as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther.  It just seemed to be stuck.  Then the man, in his kindness, decided to help the moth, so he took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon.  The moth then emerged easily.  But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings.  The man continued to watch the moth because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time.  Neither happened!  In fact, the little moth spent the rest of its life crawling around with a swollen body and shriveled wings.  It was never able to fly and died an early death.  What the man in his kindness and haste did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the moth to get through the tiny opening was the was of forcing fluid from the body of the moth into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon.  Freedom and flight would only come after the struggle.  By depriving the moth of a struggle, he deprived the moth of its health and life>.
from Chicken Soup for the Soul, by Jack Canfield
 

 These poems all point out the value and importance of taking risks...of choosing to move out of our comfort zone and delve into the problems and struggles that are part of risking.  We need to embrace the feelings of confusion and anxiety that come from being in the unknown, knowing that we are growing.  Dealing with the challenges that come from risking create resiliency and toughness;  we are developing our risk muscle so that, like the moth,  we can develop our wings and fly  If we don't take risks, we become dull and lifeless like the coral on the leeward side of the island.  Risking moves us towards finding our passion...becoming spectacularly alive, like the coral on the windward side!   Although we like security, we need adventure to become all that we can be...to grow...to thrive...to reach our potential and achieve fulfillment.

Helen Keller once said <Security is mostly superstition.  It does not exist in nature nor do the child of man as a whole experience it.  Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure.  Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing>

Ask yourself the following questions:
*What big risk could I take that would substantially improve the quality of my life?
*What brings me passion? What risks can I take that will bring passion to my life?
*What risk do I want to take now that I am not taking?  When can I start?
*What am I doing to avoid risking?  How am I protecting myself from the problems and challenges that I need to deal with?  How can I stop protecting myself and move forward into action?

 Can we actually avoid taking risks ...and stay in our comfort zone?  Not so, according to the <Universal Law of Dissipative Structures: the more fixed and stable something becomes, the greater the potential for instability> If a person postpones taking risks the time eventually comes when s/he will either be forced to accept a situation s/he doesn't like or take a risk unprepared.
I would rather be at choice and choose the risks I want/need to take for my personal growth than let chance determine what happens.
Therefore, how can I best prepare for productive, growthful risks?

Preparing for Responsible Risk-taking...some important questions to ask yourself (and answer):
*What are the pros & cons of taking this risk?  What is the worst possible consequence, and could I handle it?
*Is this the right time to take this risk?  When would be the right time? Can I set a deadline for taking the risk?
*Who will support me in taking this risk? Where can I find people to support, encourage,  and stand by me?
*What role models do I have that can motivate me and show me the way?  Who can I talk to?
*What information do I need to better prepare me to take this risk? What skills do I need?
*Do I have the reserves (of time, money) that I might need to be better prepared?  How can I build my reserves?
*What does my intuition tell me about taking this risk?
*Do I have the <Can Do> attitude I need to Go for It?
*What can I do to motivate myself to take this risk?  How can I reward myself once I take it?
*What might prevent me from taking this risk?  What blocks may get in the way to my risking  and how can I remove them?

*How can I risk to be all that I can be - to find my passion?

<Risking my Significance:
I will not live the unlived life.
I will not live in fear of failing or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days to allow my living to open my eyes,
make me less afraid - more accessible to loosen my heart until
it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise...
I choose to risk my significance to live,
so that which came to me as seed goes to the next blossom,
and that which came to me as blossom goes on as fruit>
by Donna Markova from  <The Art of the Possible>.

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Recommended Tasks:

1. Take that risk today! Go for it!

2. Take your <Risk History>
* List all the risks you have taken in your life...childhood..adolescence...young adult...adult..
*What was the outcome from each risk?  What did you learn?
*What blocks occurred with each risk?  how did you deal with these blocks?  what did you learn?
*What risk changed the course of your life?
*What risk do you regret not taking?
*What risk could you take now that would profoundly change your life?
*What have you learned about yourself and your risking process from taking this risk history?

3.  Make a Personal Risk-Taking Contract:
*I plan to take the following risk:
*What are my blocks?  How can I reduce them?
*What are my motivators to risk?
*What information do I need?  What skills do I need? What resources?
*Who needs to be involved?  Who will support me?
*What action steps do I need to take? How will I reward myself for each action step?
*When do I start?  When do I expect to complete the risk?

4.  Call or email me for a complimentary half-hour COACHING session to discuss your risk history and/or to support you in taking risks!
Voice:617-494-1422;  email: laurie@ingearcoaching.com

5. . Come to my new teleclass to discuss Finding your Passion - by taking risks!  Wednesday, February 7th @ 9pm EST.  Register @www.teleclass.com or www.womensu.som  or email me: laurie@ingearcoaching.com

6. Read one of the books mentioned below..
 
7. Go to my Website www.ingearcoaching.com for back issues of my newsletter to read
 more articles on taking risks, as well as articles on building self esteem, becoming assertive...and much more
..
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Recommended Reading:

<Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway> by Susan Jeffers

<Risking> by David Viscott
If you cannot risk, you cannot grow.
If you cannot grow, you cannot become your best.
If you cannot become your best, you cannot be happy.
If you cannot be happy, what else matters?

<Risk to Win: A Woman's Guide to Success> by Jeannette Scollard

<Risk-Taking: The Path to Personal Growth...a workbook> by Joseph Ilardo

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**Check out my new booklet on experiential activities for trainers: 75 of my favorite activities
learned from years of working as an instructor for Outward Bound Professional Development Programs.
GAMES & INITIATIVES for NETWORKING, ENERGIZING, & TEAM-BUILDING...now available...hard copy ($20) or pdf. file ($15)
Send check to Laurie Geary, 4 Canal Park, PH9, Cambridge, MA 02141;  email request to: laurie@ingearcoaching.com or order at my website: www.ingearcoaching.com

and look for my upcoming workbook on <Risk to Grow>

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UPCOMING LOCAL WORKSHOPS:

BE A PERSONAL & PROFESSIONAL COACH
*Boston Center for Adult Education
 Tuesday, April 3, 2001, 6:30-9:30 pm
 and Tuesday, June 5, 2001
also
*NSCC, Wednesday, February 28th, 9-3 p.m.

RISK-TAKING: THE PATH to PERSONAL GROWTH
*BCAE -6:30-9:30 pm.-
Tuesday, April 10, 2001 and Thursday, June 7th,2001
also
*NSCC: Wednesday, February 21, 2001, 9-3pm

BUILD YOUR SELF ESTEEM WITH THE 8-A SYSTEM
*NSCC: Wednesday, April 4, 2001, 9-3pm

ATTRACTING WHAT YOU WANT IN LIFE
*Middlesex Community College - Saturday, February 24th from 9 to 4 pm

Boston College/Brown University Alumni Clubs: Career Networking Night
CREATING BALANCE IN YOUR LIFE
Thursday, February 8, 2001

MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) Staff Training
Watertown Free Library; Thursday, March 16, 2001
and
Beverly Hospital: Thursday, March 22, 2001

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